My daughter, Ayra Safiyya, was 13 days early.

4 days before, I had changed gynaes after much thinking/praying/talking/pondering/etc. It was a totally crazy move, and although a couple of people ‘congratulated’ me for it, many didn’t understand why I did such a thing…

However, I do not regret this move one tiny bit. After going through a pretty trying and detached labor and birth for my first child, I was more than determined to have as much of a natural birth as I could this time around.

The whole pre-labor story is rather long, so I will just go to labor day. And I was actually looking forward to labor starting, however crazy that may sound!

After about sunset on the 9th of September 2009 (my husband was giving me a dateline of midnight because of the date, but too bad my daughter was not ready!), I was in the bathroom and noticed a slight blood-tinged discharge after going to the toilet. Hmmm, I wasn’t sure whether labor was imminent, but got myself prepared just in case it was. However, I went along with my usual activities, playing with my son, washing up, etc etc.

At about 11-ish at night, I felt some odd, uncomfortable surges in my lower abdomen (I was watching a comedy series with DH) but still wasn’t sure because it felt different relative to my first labor! I was sitting on the exercise ball and trying different positions to make myself more comfortable – and the surges were actually about 10 minutes apart. They weren’t painful, just uncomfortable.

Went to bed at about nearly 1am, but awoke about 2am, feeling more uncomfortable with the surges and just couldn’t lie down any more. Called Wai Han at about 2.24am from my kitchen, and she said that this may be it! I made myself a drink, and went back upstairs.

I really could not lie down. I wanted to rest a bit more but it was just impossible. So I tried leaning on the exercise ball (me seated, ball in between my legs and me slouching over the ball) while getting some rest but even this was getting uncomfortable after about 30 minutes… this whole time, everyone was asleep. Then I decided I would try to sit on the toilet to deal with the surges to see if it would be more comfortable. If I recall correctly, surges were about 5 minutes apart but I didn’t think much of it because they weren’t painful! All through this, I had the Birth Affirmations from Hypnobirthing playing through my portable mp3 player.

So there I was on the toilet. In deep relaxation, unaware of the time. When surges were 2 minutes long, and about 4 minutes apart (or a bit more) I asked DH to time the surges, and told him to quickly call my mom, as I was thinking perhaps it would be time for me to go to the hospital!!! I called Wai Han again at about 4.40am, and she said I could be pretty dilated! I was checking with her because things were very different from the first labor, so I just wasn’t all that sure! Told DH to call my mom again (basically to look after my son while we were at the hospital) and to HURRY or we’d be having the baby in the house!!! By this time, there was almost no respite between surges. (On hindsight, I think I was about 7-8cm dilated at this point…) Just before I got off the toilet, my whole mucus plug came out. Thereafter, I had at least 2 minutes in between surges…

We left for the hospital at about 5am. Arrived almost 5.30am. In the car, I was leaning against my son’s car seat, on my hands and knees – I knew I needed to slow down labor so I could’ve been summoned by the police for not having my seatbelt on!

Handed the nurse my birthplan. They were still really relaxed, asking me what time my contractions started, how long etc. I vaguely told them what they needed to know (it was really hard though!). I insisted on having my own shirt on, and they complied (it was in the birthplan). Then a nurse asked for permission to do an internal examination, and right after that, she started to walk really fast. Out she went of my room. When she came back, I asked her how far along I am. She said, “You are 9cm already, I have informed the doctor, he is on his way.” I told her, “But I feel like pushing!” And she said I should wait because I am not fully dilated yet etc etc. All this while I was trying to find a comfortable position while the surges kept coming at 1 minute apart. Finally I settled on being on my hands and knees, facing the head of the bed and leaning against it. With every surge, I would breathe through it, and also get my lower back massaged by the nurse/DH and that helped somewhat. In between, I would lean on the headrest of the bed.

Thank God the gynae finally arrived after 30 minutes, he did another internal, and told me I could have my baby at that point. Yay!

And so begun my experience of a totally natural birth, no painkillers, no episiotomy, no constant fetal monitoring – but with some shouting and grunting with every surge, ha ha. Lights were dimmed, gynae sitting by the side letting me do the job (:P), 2 nurses (I think) at the foot of the bed, all quiet with DH at my side. I even had to ask the gynae if I should change positions because everyone was so quiet except for my voice, I was beginning to worry I wasn’t progressing!

I was pushing (sometimes forgetting to breathe baby out, sometimes remembering – I was also getting a bit tired from being on my hands and knees, but glad that I could sit down in between surges to rest) for about 30 minutes, and got really geared up when they said they saw the head. It was an experience I will never forget… how I felt the perineum stretch, and how it numbed, and how the baby’s head came out, followed by the body… it was extremely empowering! Something I never felt with my first birth. I swear I felt like I was in one of those amazing birth videos you see on youtube! This birth has left me knowing that I can and know how to birth my child if I am allowed to… Once again, no regrets for changing gynaes at 38 weeks pregnant!!

Everything went according to my birthplan, alhamdulillaah (Praise be to Allaah). Gynae waited for the cord to stop pulsating, and DH cut it (this was a spontaneous decision!). 10 minutes later, the placenta was expelled naturally. I was given a couple of stitches for some small tears – what a completely different post-natal recovery as compared to an episiotomy!!!

In short, it was such a peaceful and tranquil birth, I couldn’t have asked for a better one… till this day (it has been 1 month since my daughter was born), I still long for that moment when the gynae passed me my little girl the moment she was out, and left her with me for many hours after that (except for 5 minutes to take her weight) – when she lay in my left arm, covered in blood and vernix… sigh.

I pray and hope that if I ever have more babies in the future, I would surely want a birth alike this, if not better (shorter labor perhaps? Ha ha). The nurse did warn me to get to the hospital earlier the next time around!

— Rayhana (Sept 09)

Baby Arya Safiyya